The mild-mannered reporter Colin Clark is sneaking onto the grounds of Hogwarts.This is because he is mild-mannered, and so badgered into it by his boss, and a reporter for an almost-tabloid newspaper, and so this is pretty much his job.He's doing remarkably well so far, if only because he's been smart enough to wear properly camouflaging clothing for the expedition.
A rather large ferret starts stalking this strange intruder into his territory.
Mr. Clark has apparently gotten himself up in a ghillie suit--with a rather large camera instead of a gun, however. If it weren't for the fear of being detected, he'd probably be grumbling to himself as he makes his way slooooowly towards the castle.
The ferret-creature is amused. He snickers and chortles to himself in a distinctly unferret-like manner, and stalks some more.
Colin continues, having apparently not yet noticed the ferret. Of course, the fact that he apparently can't get his camera to actually take a picture might be what he's focusing on.
Tired of stalking, the creature bounds in a ferret-like fashion around the man and stops in front of him. Staring.
"!" says Colin, succintly, and then freezes, hoping that the creature will pass him by. He's almost certain that he's read somewhere that ferrets can't see you if you don't move.
Stare stare stare. Apparently the ubiquitous 'they' were wrong. Or perhaps...it's not a ferret after all?"Slimygreasybastard!"
"..." he says, most lugubriously. And then: "...That isn't a very nice thing to say."
It hops and chitters excitedly, sticking its tongue out now and then."Bastidbastidbastid! Grotty muppet! Bloody pillock!"
Colin edges just a little bit further forward on his elbows. "Er...would you like me to take a picture of you?" Hoping that the quasi-almost-okay-it-isn't-really flattery might make the jarvey go away.
"Barmy bampot! Poxy plonker!" He hops and chitters some more, growing quite enthusiastic. And a bit loud.
"Is that a yes, or a no?" asks Colin quietly, eying his surroundings. He keeps edging forward.
"GitgitgitgitgitGIT!" He's nearly flipping over backwards with excitement, now, and getting very loud.
Colin edges a little over to the side, fumbling through his pockets. "Er, ah...want a candy bar?" Hurrah! The power of snacking prevails..er..maybe...perhaps?
"!!!" He bounces even more, for once not hurling insults. He is, however, making grabby motions with surprisingly agile fingers as his beady black eyes stare at the candy intently.((...>_>; Shut up. You saw nothing.))
Colin fumbles through the pockets of the proper suit he's still wearing under the gilly suit, finally pulling out a bar of Cadbury chocolate and unwrapping it, offering it to the jarvey.
He snatches it out of the intruder's hands and starts stuffing as much in his mouth as it can possibly hold. He looks quite pleased with himself.
Colin smiles at the odd animal hesitantly before continuing to edge forward on his elbows.
He finally looks up from the candy and stares at the intruder again, now moving away. Oh that just won't do, that won't do at all. Cramming the last of the chocolate in his mouth, he dashes over and jumps on the man's back, sitting down primly. He obviously expects to be carried to wherever the intruder intends on going.